I’ve been neglecting this place, I know. Sometimes I find being here overwhelming, and reading about mental health particularly so. I haven’t really been commenting or reading anyone’s blogs for that reason, I’m sorry.
Here’s a brief update, anyway.
I’ve been increasingly down for a while and had an interesting mental ~episode a few days ago that I can’t really call anything but borderline, I guess. It wasn’t pleasant but I got through it. My coping mechanisms weren’t the most healthy (hello mild SI) but I stayed safe and didn’t burn any bridges with the people who helped set the whole thing off.
Not sure if I’ve mentioned this here but I’ve fired my old endocrinologist and got myself a nice new one. I know I complained about the old endocrinologist making shitty remarks about my weight, but I’ve since learned that she:
1) told a very sick patient he was completely fine for over a year, whilst double charging him for appointments because was rich
2) double charged other patients for appointments because they were Indian
3) bullied her lovely receptionist and fired her without pay.
The lovely receptionist is now working for my new endo, and quite a few patients have flocked to join her. Including me, obviously.
Unfortunately at the new endocrinologist’s we realised I’m still not responding properly to the PTU and because it will eventually damage my liver if I keep on it, I’m going to have to choose between RAI and surgery in the near future. I knew I’d have to eventually, I just… hate the thought of doing something irrevocable.
And I’m still not back at work. This in itself depresses me. I don’t know when I’ll feel well enough to work a full day, and part of me feels like I’m just a fraud anyway. I don’t know what to do about it to be honest. I can’t keep burying my head in the sand, but if I think about my situation or think about nice people at work I just find myself wanting to jump off a bridge.
So that’s that.
Like this:
Filed under: Uncategorized Tagged: | Bipolar Disorder, borderline personality disorder, cfs, depression, Fibromyalgia, mental health, work
Hello under-rock dweller. I’m glad to see you peek out briefly.
sounds like more than a few complaints should be made to the people who govern doctors about her behaviour – that’s atrocious.
And here, have a hug *hug*
<3 thanks sally. i have more complaints about the endo now, as you may see shortly… i hope she gets stung by nettles forever!
Hi,
I am sorry you have been down lately. I hope you feel better soon.
As for your old endo, he sure needs a huge complaint with a medical board or whatever supervises doctors where you live. He sure sounds like a jerk. I’m glad you were able to get a new doctor. Sorry to hear about the issue with the medicine though and about the prospect of surgery.
Sorry about my delayed response; I’m a bit shit at talking to people at the moment. Surgery’s not looking so bad a prospect at the moment. I think after years of stuffing around I’m finally ready to get on with it.
And yeah I really dislike the old endocrinologist now
Obviously I don’t know you, but I doubt that somebody who can write with such candour can be a fraud – fakes simply don’t know the inner workings of these things.
Thanks for sharing; your blog is fantastic, if that’s the right word.
Sorry i took so long to reply to this; i’ve been in rather a slump. Nice to meet someone new in the blogosphere :3
Woah. How is it that ‘ professionals’ get away with that kind of crap! That’s outrageous! I’m glad your crawling out. I’m considering a debut from my duvet cave myself, but may give it another week or so. Unless I run out of oreo’s. Then I will be forced to reconsider my retreat to hibernation. Hope you feel better hun. X
I’m back under my duvet now, my trip out was very brief! :3 hope you’re feeling okay.
and yeah, some ‘professionals’ really… aren’t.